So I have had this week off work and decided to take advantage of the good weather and get some miles in on my bike.
This started on Monday when me and him indoors went to visit the grandparents and in my infinite wisdom (more like absolute stupidity) I decided we should ride up a local hill that I have heard about but never been up before – Old Church Hill. Now I hate hills so I am unsure why I decided I just had to see this beast for myself and not only see it but get up it on my bike but I did and so as we made the turn into the road I was gripping my handlebars with fear. Quite rightly too! It is a very narrow road which only fits one car and the surface is gravel, holes, bumps and all the sh*t that comes from the surrounding hedges in the rain. It is about 1 mile long and starts with a long drag and as the road bends it gets a little steeper and then it bends again and gets a little more steeper and we get to a bit that my husband tells me is the steepest part. I am now panting similar to a dog in labour and he is telling me to take deep breaths but I am aware that I am out of gears and although my legs are spinning I am convinced this is the place that I will die. The road bends again and he asks me if I am ready. Ready for what? If we have just hit the steepest part does this not mean we are about to hit the fun part? The descent? Oh no the road bends and there is more to climb. In a moment of panic I just say no, unclip and stop. What follows is a foul mouthed angry exchange of words between husband and wife (you know the ones) and he basically tells me to get back on my bike and carry on. Only problem is that the hill is too steep I cannot start and get clipped in to move so have to go down slightly to a driveway (in which were children playing who must have heard our pleasant loving words to one another) and start again. I reach the top and have equal measures of anger for my non-sympathetic husband who I want to push down the hill and myself for not at least attempting to try and finish the climb.
Now I am stubborn and so on the way back from seeing dear old Nan and Grandad I am psyching myself up to tackle this climb again and so we reach the road and pass it before I insist we go up it again so around we turn and it is take 2. Second time round I knew what to expect which is a small consolation, but this climb was hard. I can hold my own on a flat and a descent but any sort of incline turns me into a wheelchair ridden tortoise and this one I don’t even have a funny anecdote to give but if I recorded myself you would listen and wonder if it was an animal in pain – nope just me panting my way up. Deep breaths he says again, you are doing great he says (kind liar), and we reach the part I stopped before. I am talking to myself in my head telling myself come on Lisa do it, just do it. He then starts counting down – 400 meters left. It should help but ever the pessimist I think Jesus Christ 400 more meters?!?!?!? We get to the top!! I did it!! Quickly unclip lean over bike and see if my gas canister can be used to inflate my lungs.
We then go down the hill which should be fun but actually this narrow road is like navigating through rubble so not so fun. Then he shouts at me to stop. I am confused? Turn around he says. What I say? We are going up again he says. I hate him. How long does it take to organise a divorce? I will sell his fancy bike for a packet of love hearts and a curly wurly, that will show him. But I do turn around and so we are on take 3. This is the decider will I get up it or have to stop? I have no idea how but I got up it. For me I think if I did it once I know I can do it again. This should make it easier but it doesn’t I still sounded awful – you know I said once I dropped my vagina on a ride? On this climb I think I dropped a lung. It probably landed in a pot hole, and I left it there in the gravel as it is now good for nothing.
Now wouldn’t it be funny if we got to the bottom and he suggested going up yet again? Well he tried it and I told him to f*ck off. He said he didn’t think anyone had been up it three times and I said I don’t care to be the first person and headed in the direction of home and no hills like Old Church Hill.
Tuesday saw a lovely ride with two Romford CC members, and friends, Sophie and Steve out to Hanningfield, via Billericay, to visit Yellow Jersey Cycles. Slight incident there when I stopped in a hard gear and tried to start at traffic lights in said hard gear, and on a hill, and promptly fell to my right. Dusted myself off and walked the short distance to the shop for the lovely Nate to straighten my now wonky saddle – stupid Lisa! Had such a lovely day with these two, lots of laughter, banter and tea!
Wednesday I was back on the bike with the lovely Gemma at the Cycle Centre in Redbridge for her debut road bike ride. She did amazing and I am looking forward to going out with her again! (I didn’t ride in the slippers below – even I am not that bad!)
In the evening I was invited to a fitness bloggers meeting by the lovely Lucy from Lucy Lunges. I was so nervous imagining meeting a group of super fit peeps and there is me who blogs about falling off my bike, losing a lung and generally giving it a go without really knowing what I am doing. It was such a lovely evening though, we did bowling with some tips from a coach, had some drinks, ate some food and all chatted about our blogs and what we were up to and met some really lovely people!
Yesterday I cycled my first solo ride. I always cycle with people and need to get out on my own rather than relying on others and so I headed out for a short ride. I headed to the country lanes, which was a stupid mistake as the wind was ridiculous but I did it and that was all I wanted – not sure what I was worried about now!
Today is Friday and therefore rest day – and breathe! Before a 10k Race for Life tomorrow with the lovely Anna and Kelly and then off to watch my husband in a triathlon on Sunday.
It’s all go go go!
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